Alisa Miller

How to have a perfect Valentines Day



Posted: Thursday, February 12, 2009

by
http://alisa-miller.com

This is the part where you normally expect to hear the usual story: a bunch of flowers, some champagne and chocolate, a romantic meal somewhere expensive maybe a movie and (depending where your relationship is and where you stand with your beliefs) the kind of sex which reaffirms love and makes you wake up with a warm glow in the morning.

Except all this is a cliché, going through the motions because Valentine's has become one huge wall of expectations driven by commercialism and the need to create a ‘perfect' day for someone you feel something  about. While the latter is ok the pressure to make a day artificially ‘great' only serves to highlight the fact that far too often we succumb to the need to fit in with a preconceived notion of what should be done and entirely miss the point that Valentine's Day is a day for celebrating the love and affection we really feel for someone special and which should be an extension of the love and affection we feel for them all year round.

In a relationship, even one which is at its very earliest point what matters most are the things which make it real. The little things which are the details which transform the connection between two people from something which is ok to something that feels magical. Take this into a Valentine's Day setting and breakfast in bed with coffee and freshly baked croissant, decorated with a small bar of chocolate and blood-red rose suddenly transform an ordinary morning into one of those movie moments which can really make your partner feel special. 

Valentine's Day works best when it's kept small and personal with attention to detail and small personal touches. Does your partner have a favourite movie? A book about it, a DVD or even a repeat viewing is in order. Does your partner have a favourite song? Playing it over breakfast, getting them a ringtone (if they have not got one) or even getting them an MP3 player (provided they have not got one) is the perfect way to tell them you love them, care about them and really pay attention to what matters to them.

The two most precious things in life are time (which once spent never comes back) and memories. Use the day to spend as much time as possible together (take time off work if you have to) and create some unforgettable memories by making it uniquely your own.

This way Valentine's Day becomes a celebration just for you and your partner which is exactly the way it was meant to be.

Alisa Miller is a relationship counselor and relationship author. Her articles on relationships and how to have the perfect marriage have appeared in newspapers and magazines all over the world. She is the author of the Ultimate Guide to the Perfect Relationship which is being translated into three languages and has been read by thousands all over the world. It can be ordered through Amazon or any good bookshop and it is available as an eBook from most quality online eBook outlets. She has written a guide on How to Talk to a Girl you Like  which is available to buy from every online eBook retailer as well as her own website, which she runs herself and which contains hundreds of articles with useful tips and advice. She admits that she spends more time online than she should.
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